Happy Thanksgiving!

Today is a perfect day to DECIDE to be happy.  Depression can take over during the holidays, but if we make the CHOICE to be thankful, everyday, if not for just ONE thing, we will build a habit of seeing things differently.  Although we struggle with life, what helps me get through, is knowing that everything happens for a reason and I am EXACTLY where I am supposed to be. I hope that everyone finds their happiness today and realizes all they are grateful for! 

What I Have Learned From Tinder

Okay, so, it's not the Tinder "flame" but I didn't want the photo to be taken down for copyright issues.

If you are single and you have a smart phone, you have probably heard of TINDER and you PROBABLY have used the App.  Here is what I have learned while using the "hook up" App (as most people would describe it).

1. You can only use TINDER if you connect it to your Facebook or Instagram accounts.

2. TINDER is not a website, it is an actual App that must be downloaded.

3. You will get NOWHERE unless you post photos of yourself.

4. Said photos can only come from either one (or both) of your shared social media sites described above. 

5. People use a variety of photos to attract a "mate", "B/F", "G/F", "NSA (no strings attached)", "DTF (Down to F****)", "hook up", etc.

6.  Examples of photos:

• Person with a dog/cat
• Person with a child
• Person in a photo with 5 other people
• Person taking a picture in front of a bathroom mirror
• Person taking a picture of themselves laying in bed
• Person with their spouse/significant other
• Person with their spouse/significant other cropped out of photo
• Person's mugshot photo
• Person holding a beer or some other alcohol
• Person lifting weights
• Person making hand signs and wearing gold chains
• A pet - only
• A penis, breasts or other body parts
• Person with their grandparents
• Person who's photo is blurry beyond reason
• Person who is wearing sunglasses
• Person wearing a hat pulled down over their eyes
• A cartoon or crude statement

 7. People all seem to love to hike, hang out and watch Netflix, enjoy their 420 time or they are making up crazy activities that you know that no one has ever done.

8. People are looking for: 

• Someone to hike with
• Someone to "see how things go" with
• Sex
• No strings attached
• Husband and wife are looking for a third for their relationship
• Many are new to the area and want a tour guide
• Did I say sex?
• Someone who works out and is into fitness (code for someone who is not fat and lazy)
• No hook-ups, only looking for their soul-mate

 9. The goal for guys is to quickly get the girl's telephone number so they can text them dirty photos.

10. TINDER is a numbers game and the goal is to swipe left (or push the X) if you don't like the person/photo or swipe right (push the heart) if you do like them.  There is also a SUPER LIKE option, but I am not really sure what difference there is

11. Sometimes you can get to going so fast that you accidentally "NO" someone that you didn't mean to.

12. People will disappear as quickly and easily as they appeared.

13. Most men cannot seem to form sentences.  And if they do, they either only want to talk about themselves or talk about sharing naked photos.

14. GHOSTING is a term used when you meet up with someone, have sex with them, believe you have had a great time and that you have a future with the person and then never hear from them again. 

15. UPDATE: I have also learned that my "husband" is on TINDER - I can't wait for our divorce to be final!!!

TINDER is not for everyone but if you enjoy "playing" the game, it can be quite entertaining.

 
 

 

The 5 Love Languages - Gary Chapman

I am reading an interesting book that I have been meaning to read for the last few years.  I purchased it in hopes of learning more about relationships and to help me better understand exactly what makes me and others "tick".

Author, Gary Chapman, explains in his book that there are 5 Love Languages.  I have mentioned them below along with some of my own comments and insights:

1. Words of Affirmation: People like to be complimented, praised and encouraged.  They like to hear kind words that help build them up and make them happy.  They don't like to hear demanding words.  Focus on how important words are.
2. Quality Time: Loved ones enjoy spending time with each other.  They appreciate your full attention and interest.  They like to experience fun adventures or quiet times with you.  Dialogue is important to keep things interesting.
3. Receiving Gifts:  Some people feel love when they are taken care of and given gifts.  Gifts can be visual symbols of love and show that someone was thinking of you.  This is derived from the marriage ceremony when rings are exchanged.  Some feel this act is very important.
4. Acts of Service: Having someone do something that you would like them to do is another way of feeling loved.  Having a meal cooked, pants hemmed, laundry cleaned, are all examples of service.  Personally, I feel that this is most men.  Men like to be taken care of and this came from the care that was given to them by their mothers.  It's important to remember that requests give direction on how to love, but demands stop the flow of love.
5. Physical Touch:  Touching is not limited to one localized are of the body.  Tiny tactile receptors are located throughout the body.  When those receptors are touched or pressed, nerves carry impulses to the brain.  The brain interprets these impulses and we perceive that the thing that touched us is warm or cold, hard or soft.  It causes pain or pleasure.  Some people feel love at the hands of another which is why some enjoy casual flings and one night stands.

I think that many people, like myself, feel loved with each of these languages and not just one.  However, there is usually one that is more important that another, and that is what should be focused on in your relationship.

What is your language of love?

Part 2: Mini-Story: Heading For Trouble© - Written by Jennifer Dorsett

To read the first chapter of this mini-story, please click here: Part 1

 

Bo kept fiddling with his wedding ring.  Kate could not help but read into that.  Does he feel guilty for flirting?  Is he having impure thoughts about her?  Well, of course that is what she was hoping for!

 

“This ring belonged to my Dad, it’s even got his initials in it,” Bo whispered, as he caught Kate staring.  Kate nodded as if uninterested, but she was dying to know if it was now HIS wedding ring or if this meant he was not married.  She would have to find out, soon.

Lunch time came and the class was free to eat wherever they wanted as long as they made it back within the next hour.  Kate was excited to eat at her favorite Mexican food place nearby and mentioned it in passing to Bo.  She secretly hoped he would end up at the same restaurant, but an hour later, they both returned to the class separately.  It would have been nice if they had been able to slip away and have a flirtatious lunch that would lead to perhaps drinks later.  

Kate was brought back down to earth by the sound of the teacher starting class.  Three and a half more hours left of day one and Kate was ready for a nap, but looked forward to her afternoon next to Bo.

Bo found little ways to get Kate’s attention and make her smile.  He made subtle innuendos that were not so innocent and certainly not something a married man should be doing.  There was even a point where their hands brushed against one another, leading both of them to blush.  

Kate fantasized about all of the possibilities that this 4 day class, at a hotel, could bring.  Unfortunately, the hotel was local to all of them, so there was no need to stay the night.  Unless…..

Unless, after class, Bo hands her a room key and suggestively invites her up to his room.  Or, he leans over, and whispers in her ear, “I want you!” and they sneak out to the lobby and duck into a stairwell.  The fantasies must have gone on for a while, because Kate had no idea the class was wrapping up.

As they walked out, down the stairs and to the parking lot, they casually talked about their children, with no mention of spouses.  As they reached the outside, they parted ways with a wave and a “See you tomorrow”, in unison.

“Damn!” was all Kate could think.  This was nothing like her fantasies.

Later that evening, she decided to do a little internet stalking and attempted to find out more about Bo.  Because Bo announced that he was a semi-professional race car driver, she figured there would be no problem finding him on the web, even only knowing his first name.  After an hour, Kate realized it was not as easy as she had hoped.  She racked her brain, trying to remember where he said that he worked.  It was a big building down town, but that was all she knew.  Next, she started searching for high school baseball teams. 

She felt a little guilty and much like a pervert, however, Bo had mentioned that he was a volunteer coach at one of the area high schools.  How hard could it be to go to each sight and look at team photos, read stories, etc.  Surely, they would mention him and she would discover his last name.  No such luck!  Kate giggled at the thought of how she would appear to her friends if they ever found out about her stalking skills.  Not to mention how her ex-husband would feel if he knew she was pining over a married man.  After all, his infidelities within their marriage were hardly acceptable.

The morning was approaching quickly and Kate decided to end her pursuit.  She would have to find out more about Bo tomorrow.  Then she had a terrible thought, “What if we don’t get to sit by each other tomorrow?” Kate asked the question aloud, but knew that she would do everything in her power to spend more time with him, even if she had to get to class early.

 

 

Stay tuned for more of the short story, Heading For Trouble©, Written by Jennifer Dorsett.

Mini-Story: Heading For Trouble © - Written by Jennifer Dorsett

Kate was going to be late.  It seemed to be a habit that she had formed over the last several years.  To be early almost always seemed impossible.

She arrived at the class just in time to have the instructor turn and look at her with that irritated look of someone being interrupted mid-sentence.  Kate stood at the back of the room, as she evaluated her seating options.  The instructor said, "It looks like there are only seats available down here in the front".  Kate quickly chose the most available seat, which so happened to be at the very front of the room, facing the rest of the class and presenting her back to the instructor.  This was not going to be a good 32 hours.

After everyone introduced themselves and explained why they were attending the training seminar, Kate had her chance to move in between two people at a different table.  Now she could face the instructor.  Of course, the move did not go unnoticed by the disapproving glare the teacher gave her.

Kate was seated between a man to her right and a woman to her left.  The man to her right introduced himself, "Hi, I am Bo".  Bo spoke with a southern drawl and it was obvious he was a transplant from Texas.  He was quite handsome and when he smiled at Kate, she felt a fluttering in her chest.  Judging by the ring on his left hand, she did not want to encourage the flirtation, but dang it if he wasn't persuasive.

Throughout class, a bond began forming between Bo and Kate.  With the sideways glances, the deep, meaningful smiles and the gazes into one another's eyes that lasted a little too long, it was obvious there was something brewing.  

Kate had no memory of how to flirt.  Finding herself single, after 25 years of marriage, Kate felt nervous and awkward.  Bo had been the first guy who showed an interest in her since her divorce, 6 months ago. She decided to just be herself and go with it.  Why not have some fun over these next 3 days?  What could be the harm?  Bo was married.  Surely this was innocent banter.  Boy, did Kate have surprises in store for her.....

Stay tuned for more of the short story, Heading For Trouble©, Written by Jennifer Dorsett.

Share: Great Article on Breaking Up

From The Change Blog

Writer Rachael Ann Mare writes about how a breakup taught her to relax and be herself.  I wanted to share this with you because I think it is a great story.  Although it has a happy ending, sometimes we don't get the girl/guy back.  Because I am going through a breakup, I found this very inspiring at least knowing that I WILL find "me".

I will share a few bits from the article.  You can read Rachael's story directly at: How A Breakup Taught Me To Relax And Be Myself


"..I thought I would be over it, or at least feel okay. I wasn’t, and I didn’t.  I had tried to be friends with him. I had tried to not be friends with him.  I cried a lot either way."


"When we first broke up, I spent an embarrassing amount of time reading Internet articles about how to get your ex back." 


"If I wanted him back, most of the books said, I couldn’t let him see how much I hurt. I had to be out there having a great time."


"I had this idea of how I was “supposed” to deal with the breakup “in order to” get him back, and it was killing me.  Instead of actually focusing on me, I let my wanting to control him—to make him come back—get the better of me, and I focused on him and how he was going to respond to what I was doing instead of on my own needs and feelings."

"I remembered all the things about our relationship that didn’t work for me.  I focused on work, on launching my blog and website and doing scads of writing, and I loved it.  I could never do all that while obsessing over his next move.  I stopped needing a relationship and started looking for someone who complemented my life."


~This is a good story, check it out: Go to The Change Blog to read

The Pisces

As promised, I am sharing interesting information regarding Astrology.

Pisces

Pisces needs a dominant partner or role model in their life or they will very easily fall into a pit of self-pity and self-undoing. When they are independent and inspired by life's events, their creativity comes shining through but they are unable to be on their own for long before they start dreaming in their imaginary world of happy people and happy endings. They need other people to keep them grounded and on the right track.  They need a strong positive friend to make them strong.

Pisces does not take well to a position of leadership or high business person, they are too sensitive and lacking in self-discipline and lacking self-confidence for a positions such as that.  Unfortunately, most Pisces take the easy way out in life and never attain the degree of fame that they possibly could, they have to stop self-doubting themselves because they are capable of being good role models and leaders to others, people do look up to them. 

The Pisces personality is hard to pin down, it is very mysterious and elusive. Pisces are molded by their surroundings, they incorporate their experiences and surroundings into themselves. They have extreme compassion and they feel the pain of others. If something is wrong in the world that affects them, it affects them deeply, they take it to heart and feel extreme feelings regarding the matter. When they are happy, they are extremely happy and when they are sad, they are extremely depressed.  Pisces downfall is their sensitivity and their inability to reject another person. They do not like rejection and they try to treat others the way they want to be treated so they will rarely say no to a person for fear of hurting their feelings. They will help another person with their problems and like to do so because making others feel good in turn makes them feel good. Pisces is the zodiac sign of self-undoing. People born under this zodiac sign are not susceptible to bad luck and unfortunate events, they bring them on themselves by overindulging, laziness and a knack for picking poorly suited partners and friends. They want people in their life who stir their emotions because this helps them to practice emotional stability. The inner conflict of Pisces is extremes of temperament and conflicting emotions. They are trying to pinpoint themselves on the real world while their spiritual world can cloud their vision, they will try to escape or avoid a situation instead of confronting it. Pisces eternal struggle is to learn to use their powers and their imagination in a positive, productive way and vying for emotional stability by not giving away their emotions to everyone else, they need to help themselves. 

Pisces live in two worlds, the real world and the spiritual or mystical world where they interpret what they see into what they want. They do this to avoid all the realities of pain and suffering in the world. They have extremes of emotions and feel both good and bad intensively. Pisces have formidable intuitive ability. Most Pisces are somehow involved with occult or spiritualism. Pisces are very good at understanding people for they have the ability to delve into the psyche and see behind a person's motivations. Pisces are prone to drug addiction and indulging lifestyles because of their eternal search for themselves and their fear of confrontation and having to change a situation, also they justify drug use by allowing it to get closer with their 'spiritual selves'. Once they aware this is why they are doing it, it will be easier to kick the habit. Pisces are not the pushovers that they may seem, in fact they have strength of character and will stand up for what they believe in and and they can do hard work for something they believe in. They can be very lazy but only in matters that they do not care about. Pisces is the most sensitive of all zodiac signs.

Pisces men: They are the ultimate romantic, the sensitive man who feels with a woman. However, he has such an ideal of romance that is unrealistic and will fall out of love when he realizes that there is no such thing as the perfect woman. This man lives in the world of dreams and he needs a woman to keep him grounded.  He needs a woman who can dominate him, but very subtly. She has to be able to help him steer clear of bad habits and bad thoughts. Pisces man needs sensitivity, generosity and compassion, nurture him and he will nurture you back. A fulfilling emotional relationship for the strong yet sensitive woman. When confronted with complicated issues, he tends to retreat into his dream world and wears his "rose colored glasses". This is why Pisces man can be very temperamental and pretend there is nothing wrong when your relationship is on rocky ground. When life is not going so well, he can be very hard on himself and very self destructive so it is better for him to live in denial. The Pisces male needs a firm, strong woman to guide him because he is very indecisive and is known for sitting on the fence. The woman has to take the lead in the dating relationship. This need for nurturing is often what attracts women, women love to make him feel good and protected, sort of like a mother's instinct. The mystery of the Pisces male makes dating him unlike any other astrology sign, nothing is ever cut-and-dry, there is always the element of the unknown and a slight unreachable quality that keeps a woman's interest. If you like drama in your dating relationship, the Pisces man is for you. Your ultimate goal will be to be invited into the secret realm of his life, where he experiences things and plans ideas that no one on the outside will ever know about. To be invited into the Pisces man's mind is like being invited into another world, you can be part of his exclusive bubble and both can feel safe, warm and secure. He will protect you and cherish you and you will have a fulfilling romantic partner because he has an amazing ability for love. This is the ultimate goal in a long term relationship and this is very difficult to achieve. It takes the right amount of patience, tolerance and acceptance. Also you have to show your man kindness and sympathy because as the sign of self-undoing, he is very hard on himself and sometimes lacks motivation.

Pisces women are very captivating and fascinating. She makes a man feel like a man because of her need for a protector and leader. She is charming, soft and feminine. The ultimate enchantress. She can see right through a man and she is not easy to fool, so any man better be straight with her and not lead her on, because instead of confronting him, she will simply disappear. She needs to nurture and will give the man orders, but only for his own good. She will make sure he is eating properly and getting enough sleep, sort of like a mother nurturing a child. What she needs in return is a man to protect and cherish her, make her feel like she is needed and loved. She might almost be clingy and dependent but never overbearingly. Her partner will become of better half. She needs patience and sympathy and you have to be gentle with her. Don't poke fun or tease and definitely do not reject her harshly because she can't stand rejection. She is extremely romantic and will lose herself in the relationship. The Pisces woman is the ultra feminine nurturer, the ideal woman for the right man.  



These were copied from the website: zodiac-signs-astrology.com