Article Share: 4 Reasons Honest Men Give To End It

Because I recently went through a divorce, I of course subscribed to all sorts of blogs and websites to help me through the pain that a break-up can cause.  With that, some articles that I have read are helpful and I thought I would share one that I read this evening.

It is from the website, Relationship Rules . The article is titled: 4 Reasons Honest Men Give To End It.  This is written by "A", one of the co-founders of the website.

This article spoke to me because it is about being with someone who chooses to be honest about their feelings, about why they feel their relationship is not working, and being a grown-up and facing uncomfortableness.  I believe that honesty is really the key point that I think too many people are afraid of.  It's easier to either sweep problems under the rug, avoid conflict or just continue to not be a happy person in the relationship.

Back to the article.  I feel these reasons are about the behavior in which an honest man displays, not necessarily the reason they give to their partner.

Reason #1 an honest man gives to end it: They want everything on the table.  "A" describes that part of this has to do with not placing blame on just one person and that if you talk about all issues, the couple will realize that it is just not "one person's fault".

Reason #2 an honest man gives to end it: They don't like the blame game. Accepting fault is a true quality of an honest man.  I agree with this statement.  SOME men live with blinders about how "wonderful" their relationship is, when all the while they are unhappy and are too afraid to admit it.  This might lead to conflict and having to face fears and issues.

Reason #3 an honest man gives to end it: They care for you to have closure.  "A" says that an honest guy will always have the guts to say goodbye and they will not just disappear from facing the problem. They would never leave you hanging in between thinking what went wrong and where.  Personally, I would have appreciated this happening in one of my relationship break-ups.  Instead, being left with anger and hurt and never getting to "hash" things out and "deal" with issues has left me angry.

Reason #4 an honest man gives to end it: They respect you, still. They will never disrespect the good memories you had by leaving like a coward or like someone who wanted to run away. They will respect the fact that there are a few explanations to be given and few to be listened to.  This is SPOT on!!!

Check out the article at Relationship Rules

Positivity - It's All In How You Look At Things

I get notifications from a page I like on Facebook, Power Of Positivity.  They have all sorts of great stories and hint/tips for living a positive life.  One story in particular caught my attention and I wanted to share the main message.

Sometimes, something bad happens to us or someone we love and all we can focus on is the tragedy of things or negativity toward the situation.

"There was a story of a man who was working in a convenience store one evening.  He was not supposed to work that night, but the manager asked him to cover the shift.  While all was going as expected, a masked man came into the store and demanded money from the clerk.  Although the clerk did nothing to provoke the robber, he was beaten severely.  

After being rushed to the hospital, the young man was put through a series of tests, including a CAT scan.  This evening was a horrible experience for the clerk and he could not help but think about why this happened to him.  He was angered and resentful for what he had been put through.

Moments later, the doctor came in to discuss the test results.  The CAT scan showed that the victim of the beating actually had a brain tumor that was luckily caught in time.  Because it was found so early in its stage, it was operable and later removed.  They had said that if it had not been caught, he would have went to sleep one night and not be able to wake up. Although the situation was devastating, it actually saved this man's life."

How many things have happened to you that you later realized happened for a reason?  I know I have had a lot of turmoil throughout my life and when I look back, I see why and what I needed to learn from the situation.  I have tried to change my way of thinking about bad stuff, and have tried to look for the lesson.

My Grandmother was 85 years old and got around very good for being in her eighties.  She walked to the grocery store daily and cleaned house all week long.  One day, she was taking the garbage can to the curb when she stumbled and fell.  She was taken to the doctor.  The doctor had a concern about what made her fall.  No one thought anything of it.  However, after running tests, the doctor found that she had stage four cancer.  The strong, stubborn woman that I had known all of my life decided at that moment to give up. She withdrew from all of us, didn't want to talk to anyone and didn't want to do anything.  She also quit eating and drinking.  She basically shut down.  Several months later, my Grandma passed away.  

Now, I am not saying that how she chose to live out her final days was wrong.  In fact, I could not imagine what it would be like to learn of such a horrible disease ending my life.  However, I believe the negative situation and the way she handled it shortened her life dramatically.  And all of this happened because she fell while taking the garbage out.

In summary, things are not always as they seem.  And to sound very cliche' - everything happens for a reason.  It's not what is happening, it is how you handle it.

Visit The Power of Positivity  website to read all of their wonderful stories and insights.

EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be (possibly your roommate, neighbor, coworker, long lost friend, lover, or even a complete stranger), but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment they will affect your life in some profound way.

And sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower, or heart.

Everything happens for a reason.

Nothing happens by chance or by means of good luck.

Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul.
Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience, help to create who you are and who you become. Even the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones.

If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.

Make every day count.

Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again.

Talk to people that you have never talked to before, and actually listen.

Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high.

Hold your head up because you have every right to.

Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you.

You can make of your life anything you wish.

Create your own life and then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.

Most importantly, if you LOVE someone tell him or her, for you never know what tomorrow may have in store.

And learn a lesson in life each day that you live.

That's The Story Of Life.

~ Unknown

Trending Today: Famous Coffee Outlet & The Diaper Changing Incident

 So this baby walks into a bar.....

Nah, that didn't happen but I thought it might get your attention.

In Denver, CO, a very popular coffee chain, I am not going to name names, but it rhymes with Carbucks, had a little incident with a dirty diaper and a baby who was with his not-so-happy mom.

It seems that the mom was enjoying her coffee when she realized that her one-year old son needed his diaper changed.  She proceeded to take him into the restroom when she discovered that there were no changing tables offered by the establishment.

Does "Carbucks" think that it's only customers are laptop carrying, blazer wearing, non-fat, skinny Mocha Cappuccino drinkers?  What about the mothers who bribe their children with a Strawberries & Cream so they will do their chores after their homework is done?  It seems like more and more families are frequenting this coffee heaven and maybe the owners should re-think who their clientele is.

So, to continue the story, the mother of the baby decided to change her son's diaper in the seating area, right in front of tea drinking athletes, elderly paper-readers and impatient businesspersons.

Let's just say, this is not exactly great drinking entertainment and some of the employees decided to take matters into their own hands by treating the mother with her very own clean-up towel and words of disgust and laughter.

Mom was not too happy and I am sure, a little embarrassed.  She decided to give them their drink back when she poured it on the floor, causing quite a stir.

Now, I am a mom of two and I remember the days of searching for a changing table and sometimes not being successful.  What was I to do?  One time, when I was at the mall, I was in the only bathroom available and the only changing table was broken.  Luckily, I had a changing pad in my diaper bag and a blanket that I was able to lay on the floor to get our business done.  I know, not the most sanitary, but a mom's got to do what a mom's got to do!

What do you think about this story?

(Huff Post Denver was used to reference the events)         

Happiness: What If Something Bad Happens?

I recently read a great article over at Soulseeds that was very inspiring.  It was an article written about 6 happiness tips by Dr. Tal Ben Shaha. One of his thoughts is: Rejecting our emotions, positive or negative, leads to frustration and unhappiness.  It got me thinking.

I grew up with a lot of negativity that carried into my adult life.  As I get older and wiser, I am trying to learn to be happy and do “things” for myself.

It’s funny, the other day, I awoke to the greatest mood.  I sprung out of bed, I was so happy and full of energy.  But I had this nagging thought that kept popping into my head, “What if something bad happens?  What if it happens because you are so happy?  Don’t get used to this feeling, because soon you will go back to the way you were.”  I realized that I stand in my own way of happiness.  I have had so much “drama” in my life that I don’t know how to just be happy.  I have some work to do!!!

Living In The Past

I guess we are all accused of living in the past at some point in our lives. Well, why the heck would we NOT live in the past? The past is where everything has happened. It's where we have been hurt, learned about regret, had our hearts broken, made mistakes and lost trust. Our natural instinct is to protect ourself and put our guard up. And we learn from our mistakes and try not to make them again. I think that it is important to remember the past, but I guess the compromise, or the healthy way is to keep a handle on HOW much we think about the past. No one will ever move on with their life and learn to enjoy and live if they only look behind them. I must learn to keep all this in mind and allow things to happen and realize I cannot control the future, I can only hope for the best.